i dont understand boys.

this site has become slow as hell

hit me up on purevolume if you wanna

www.purevolume.com/listeners/sawahRAWRAH

i went to my 1st 2 shows! and they were AMAZING

i saw The Ready Set twice. Jordan and Mason were amazinggggggg

i also saw Illustrations, William and the Cougars, Kafie(sp?), Brideandgroom

then i saw Method to my Medium, Breathe Electric, The Holiday and NEVERSHOUTNEVER

omg, i had never been so excited in my life!

i got 2 shirts and cds signed

i got TONS of pics, like over 200, but im not gonna post them all on here

im too lazy lol

but i had the best time of my life so far, and Christofer&Jordan are the nicest guys everrrrr. ♥♥

you see it to good use when i get back.

i am going to Fort Wayne to see The Ready Set

then hitting Anderson on the way back to see nevershoutnever!

ill post tons of pics when i get back

 love ya! sawahh :]

:O

did anyone else know that Jack Skellington is in there?!

and that Tim Burton helped with the movie?

i'm sooo stupid..but i never really go into nightmare before christmas anyways.

never even seen it all the way thru. ahah

but yeah james and the giant peach is like, the greatest movie everr

besides Anchorman and Joe's Apartment, of course. :]

PEACE!

wooh anyways i'm tired of my parents.

all my dad does is yell at my mom and make her cry.

he tells me to "make sure i marry someone at my intellectual level, or there will be problems"

ugh. he's telling me she's not smart enough for him.

whatevrrr.

i need a break from them..

 I FORGOT TO CELEBTRATE!!!!!!!!!!

:[

oh well. but yaya happy happy!

i had this friend. he was AMAZING. we had soo much fun together. really close. he drew me pictures of us holding hands, and telling me how awesome i was, and that he hoped we'd never not be friends.

then he stopped talking to me. i tried to ask why. i got yelled at.

he was moving away in a month. i spent that month confused, hurt and unsure of what to do.

i never said goodbye. i almost got him beat up. (my guys friends were looking out for me & wanted to punch his face in for making me miserable)

a few months later, i get the nerve to email him. he apologized for everything. he said he had no idea why he was mad, but that he just was.

i forgave him. and we were talking for awhile. i asked him to come visit me&everyone else(he only move 4 hous away) he said his parents wouldnt take him.

i said id come visit him if he told me where to go.

he never did.

we were talking normally for awhile. i have a lot of problems with my trust and my "friends". he talked to me ALOT about it. saying i need to let go of everyone, start over and keep the ones im positive about. he said "people like him who will ALWAYS be there for me". i believed him. i thought he was amazing.

....then he stopped talking to me again. which is happening now. won't answer me at all.

he defied my trust in him once more.

and to top it all off, he is now going out with one of my friends from here.

he made a special trip to come see HER. who he barley knows.

i am so torn, you wouldn't believe. & people are telling me it's stupid to get worked up over it & that people change.

i am fucking aware of that.

they don't understand.

damn. this sucks.

i feel like i need a needle and thread at my side just in case i fall apart.

it tears me in half.